Pre-Marriage Counseling

The months leading up to a wedding are blissful, but they can also be hectic and stressful. Pre-marital counseling is an excellent choice for an engaged couple as it offers support plus clarification of their marital goals. To ensure a happy and lasting marriage, it is crucial for couples who are interested in marrying to understand why they are getting married, what they expect of their marriage, and how they will work through the inevitable ups and downs of life that will test their commitment to each other.

Pre-Marital Counseling NYC

I offer a wonderful program that I have created especially for engaged couples. Working together, we will review each person’s expectations for marriage and discuss important, timely issues such as:

  • Finances and budgets
  • Career opportunities
  • Sexual expectations,
  • Religion/celebrations of holidays
  • Relationship with your family of origin
  • Roles and power
  • Work life balance and how to spend leisure time.
  • Communication styles are explored and problem-solving skills are created
  • Feelings about children and parenting are also discussed

I teach my couples useful skills that will allow them to engage in heated debates and I instruct them how to de-escalate these challenging talks before they evolve into nasty spats. We will also explore difficult topics like monogamy and affairs. By being open with each other and discussing these issues before they come up, you will have a better understanding when problems arise and a solid foundation to fall back on through the years.

In our first few sessions, while I am getting to know you and your unique relationship I will help you created a “strengths map”. This will be a document that lays out your unique strengths as a couple. I encourage couples to build off of this map throughout the duration of their marriage and, equally important, to return to it when they fear they may be drifting off course.

I view premarital counseling as extremely collaborative, and I use a strong team approach to get quick results. I am very involved in the session at all times and will honestly communicate to you what I see, feel and think. Together we will establish a vision for the relationship, which incorporates the ideals of both members. My office becomes a safe haven, where topics can be discussed without judgment or retribution. Our consultation time is used as a living laboratory, a place where we can explore different styles and techniques.

Early Signs:

Relationships rarely die overnight. Almost always, the destruction of a couple happens little by little, over time.
Your relationship may be in trouble if you are experiencing:

  • Communication breakdown
  • Diminished sexual desire and activity level
  • Replaying old arguments and resurrecting old hurts
  • Resentment and contempt have replaced patience and love
  • One or both of you are having an affair


We saw Rachel when we were engaged and having major in-law problems that were interfering with the planning of our wedding. We were bickering a lot and couldn’t seem to resolve these problems on our own, and that’s why we decided to go for counseling. Rachel helped us to discuss these problems without being defensive, and taught us that we had a right to set limits with our families. We found the process very helpful, and we continue to call on her when our relationship needs a tune up.

Diane (28) & James (29)

Rachel in the media