Advice on Sex

Sex therapy for individuals and couples

Are you grappling with a sexual issue? Would you like to improve your sex life? Do you struggle with communicating your sexual desires, needs and worries to your partner? If you’ve answered yes, you may benefit from working with an experienced sex therapist who can help you.

Sexual problems are so prevalent, that nearly two thirds of all men and women will experience them at some time during their lives.

What is sex therapy?

Sex therapy is brief therapy that focuses on intimacy and sexual problems. Sex therapy differs in important ways from other forms of psychotherapy. It consists of discussions and assigned exercises done by the individual and/or the couple in their home. Some clients come to see me for specific problems and others come in for education, information and support.

Common sexual problems include:

• One partner desiring sex more than the other
• Inability to communicate what turns each other on
• One partner desiring a style of sex that the other partner is uncomfortable with
• Orgasmic difficulties
• Low desire
• Erectile dysfunction and/ or premature ejaculation

When Sex Interferes With Your Relationship:

Sexual problems need not damage your relationship. Working together we will create a plan to improve your sex life. My approach includes:

• Validation: It’s important to remember that everyone's sex life is individual and there is no objective standard every woman or man needs to meet. If your sex life works for you and your partner, then you should not worry about what everyone else is doing. If, however, you feel dissatisfied with your sex life, in any way, you may want to consider exploring the causes.
• Assessment – Exploring the causes: Are your sexual issues a bi product of other problems in the relationship, or are they purely sexual or technical in nature? Once these answers are discovered we will create a plan to change and improve the way in which you relate sexually.
• Education: Mars & Venus. Men and women tend to define and experience sex in different yet interrelated ways. Women's sexual response tends to be a complex blend of emotional and physical stimuli. It is ultimately a way to feel more intimately involved with their partner. Men tend to be less comfortable with intimacy and more at ease expressing themselves sexually. It’s their way of feeling close and connected.
• How past messages can affect our sex life. We are greatly affected by the early messages we received from our family, our religion and our culture. From a very young age we are bombarded with images and notions of what our bodies look like and how we act sexually. To truly enjoy sex, we may need to free ourselves of preconceived ideas about beauty and sex and learn what feels good to us and what we enjoy. Together we will discuss and explore your feeling about sexuality, teasing out any issues that could be holding you back from experiencing great sex with your partner.
• Create a recovery plan. . Our consultation time is used as a living laboratory, a place where we can explore different styles, interventions and techniques. It’s time to make a conscious decision to recommit to each other and move sex higher on the priority list. Get creative with your sex life. Find new ways to put some fun, energy and excitement into your relationship. Give yourself permission to explore each other's fantasies any way you can. Communicate, play, have fun and be creative.

Would you like to improve your sex life
At some point in a couples’ relationship they may feel, for any number of reasons, that their sex life isn't as satisfying as it could be.